{"id":245,"date":"2013-10-19T15:03:40","date_gmt":"2013-10-19T15:03:40","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.wanderingwithintent.com\/?p=245"},"modified":"2013-10-19T15:03:40","modified_gmt":"2013-10-19T15:03:40","slug":"vipassana-meditation-the-experience-and-what-i-learned","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.wanderingwithintent.com\/wordpress\/vipassana-meditation-the-experience-and-what-i-learned\/","title":{"rendered":"Vipassana meditation – the experience, and what I learned"},"content":{"rendered":"

Note:\u00a0 I have been posting a bit out of order, as I want to get my thoughts out on the meditation, but I am also a bit behind on things from earlier in the trip.\u00a0 So please bare with me.\u00a0 Thanks!<\/em><\/p>\n

——–<\/p>\n

Vipassana meditation is, pardon my French, a total mind fuck. \u00a0You are asked to focus your attention on observing your respiration, or sensations on your body, but your mind doesn\u2019t like to focus.<\/p>\n

In fact, it REALLY doesn\u2019t like to focus.<\/p>\n

Yup, those voices in your head that may come out from time to time come out in full force, retaliating against your attempts to silence them.<\/p>\n

Or your mind may totally shut itself down. \u00a0As in, going to sleep. \u00a0The human body is used to putting itself to sleep when you close your eyes, not working with intense focus. \u00a0I have a hard enough time going into a dark movie theater and staying awake, as those who know me can attest to. \u00a0Needless to say the first few days especially I got in a bit of shut eye during my meditative work.<\/p>\n

Having your eyes closed for that long can be really disorientating as well. \u00a0There were a few times that I got severe vertigo and couldn\u2019t tell which was up. \u00a0I\u2019d be trying to tell myself that I was sitting on the floor with my back straight, but another part of my mind would think I was leaning over to the side at an angle, causing my head to spin.<\/p>\n

So you are in a constant struggle to quiet the voices in your head without nodding off or falling over from vertigo. \u00a0Quite a mental effort.<\/p>\n

And the thoughts that come into your head are all over the map — from childhood to adulthood, funny to depressing, mundane and boring to extremely insightful. \u00a0I would jump from my Dad\u2019s stroke to my grandfather\u2019s death at one moment, and then be thinking about funny stories from my days in marching band in high school.<\/p>\n

I had an endless plethora of movies and music — all in my mind — to keep me busy as well. \u00a0I would see a scene from the movie Pulp Fiction, and then be listening to Aerosmith\u2019s Janie\u2019s Got a Gun or, increasingly as the course went on, Living on a Prayer by Bon Jovi (specifically \u201cwe\u2019re halfway there, ooohh oh, livin on a praaaayer\u201d) and Final Countdown by Europe in the last day.<\/p>\n

In between all of its distractedness, my mind actually did get a lot done when I was able to focus, which got increasingly easier as the course went on. \u00a0It got to the point where while I was focusing on the exercise at hand — observing sensations on the body, for instance — I was able to simultaneously work out different things about my life. \u00a0I\u2019m not sure if that was supposed to happen, but when you are able to focus your mind with meditation it becomes much sharper at problem solving. \u00a0In fact, I wrote close to 10 pages of ideas, thoughts, and feelings when I came finished up the course. \u00a0Some of the ideas that I had during meditation include:<\/p>\n